It was seven years ago today that your little girl passed from under the protection of her father's house and into the protection of her young husband's embrace. Seven years. Only a moment ago and yet, a lifetime. For in a moment I said goodbye to all that I held dear, my family, my friends, my hometown, all that was familiar to me. This new moment ushered me into a new life, a life with him whom I held dearest.
This weekend Joshua and I spent precious days together filled with hours recounting our beginning together. We thanked God for all that we have experienced together since our wedding day. Though our marriage was prefaced by an intimate friendship, we each began to see that the preparation for our life as one began when we were yet in the keeping of our parents.
This then is the reason for my note to you today. A note of thanks, for your example, your instruction, and your encouragement that served to prepare me for life with Joshua. As I reflect back on these past seven years, my memory beckons me back further still. Back to the days when as a young girl I awaited true love's kiss.
From my earliest days, I knew I lived in a home of love. Love was apparent in the priorities that you as parents made. It was in these primary years that I learned the roles of husband and wife. Leaving early in the morning, Dad put in full days of work, providing for his family by the sweat of his brow. I clearly remember Mom putting us in the car and driving to Dad's worksite to bring him a picnic lunch and Gatorade for his workers. In this small gesture I learned that no matter what Mom had on her plate that day, nothing was more important than serving her husband. I saw that nothing of Dad's life was for himself alone, even the workplace wasn't off limits from his beloved family.
I remember Dad bringing home flowers every week for a month while he worked near a flower shop. The florist had rock bottom prices and to a spend thrift like Dad, it was a welcome opportunity to shower his wife with beauty. Thanks, Dad, for the lesson of frugality and the lesson that generosity can still be demonstrated on a budget!
While leaning up against the kitchen counter as Mom experimented with thrifty recipes and accompanying her to the discount grocer, I learned that love was an essential ingredient when preparing meals for your family. Thank you for showing me that while dirty diapers and grocery shopping and housework are hardly romantic, it is utterly fulfilling and incomparable when done with the man you love.
There was never a moment where I wondered if you loved each other, never a moment were I worried if you would stay together. Even when as a teenager I began to see the struggles in marriage, divorce was never a word uttered in our home. Despite seemingly insurmountable adversities with finances and health, your commitment to one another kept our family together when all else was falling apart. Thank you Mom for fighting for your children, fighting to keep what God had placed together. Thank you Dad for finally surrendering to God's love and allowing that to be all sufficient for your responsibilities as a husband and father. Thank you both for teaching me the immense value of commitment, valued more than the easy way out or your own personal happiness.
Perhaps the most precious of all the lessons I learned from you was the instilling of the conviction that true love waits. When all my peers were dating and experimenting within relationships, you promised me that there was no greater treasure than my purity. You said to keep my heart for one man, to not sully and scar my emotions or spirit with the temporary thrill of attention and affection, to not give a piece of myself to someone who would not treasure and value it as he should. Assuring me that, should God so desire, He would bring into my life that One, the One for whom I was meant, the One to whom I could finally release all of my heart. True love's kiss did finally come for me, my first kiss, a kiss kept for the one I would marry. And I cannot imagine another moment so priceless, so beyond anything I had ever imagined! For nothing can compare to the knowledge that in giving myself to my husband, I would be giving all of me.
When Joshua first called to inquire of your daughter, you knew that this was it. You knew that this is what you had prepared me for. Yet you encouraged us to take our time, to get to know each other, to learn to communicate and acquaint ourselves with every aspect of the other's life. Thank you for the time you allowed us to learn of the longing and language of true love.
Even when the glimmer of a new future with my beau and the sparkle of a ring the size of a small glacier (to love's enamored eye) filled my vision, you were still there challenging my desire, testing my commitment, and evaluating my maturity. I remember on the night of my engagement when my heart was so full and my mind overwhelmed how you, Mom, took me aside and questioned my sincerity. At first I was shocked and hurt. How could you doubt my love, how could you presume to know what I wanted? But through the years, you had gained wisdom concerning marriage, the understanding that it was more than a joyous moment before the altar, it was a lifetime lived before the altar of sacrifice and selflessness, of love and respect, of nights out on the town and more nights in with dirty dishes. Now, I thank you for that moment's pause you proffered me. In the scurry of wedding plans and cross country visits to my fiance that followed, it proved to be the foundation for my certainty that yes, this is what I want, more than my independence, more than my career, more than even my own family.
Thank you Dad for continuing to be publicly affectionate and adoring of your wife. Nothing is more endearing to see a grown man care more about his wife than what you look like while with her! 'The Spider' is a tradition that has now passed into our own home, thanks to you!
Joshua and I both are aware of the influence of our parents in our lives and how that influence has brought great blessing to us even within the sphere of marriage. So, though we are celebrating each other on this special day, we want as well to celebrate the heritage from whence we came.
Here's to you, Dad and Mom, for proving to me and all others that marriage is love and commitment, filled with days of plenty and days of want, and that with God at the center, a marriage can last a lifetime.
Your loving daughter, Dina
*an addendum, to my in-laws, Appa and Amma:
Thank you for raising a boy who became the man for me. Thank you for teaching him how to love and respect a wife, for teaching him to put family first, and for exemplifying a marriage kept by the grace of God. You have taken me in as a daughter of your own flesh and blood. I am truly honored to call you family. All my love, Dina
