A Worthy Life

happy to me and who are you?!?

Today's (my) birthday, today's (my) birthday!
It's not the beaver's or the bear's or the pickle's or the pears.
Today's (my) birthday, today's (my) birthday!

(A silly song I learned as a kid, yet I still prefer the old standby, "you look like a monkey and you smell like one too!")

Now, I'm guessing you're saying to yourself, "Enough about your birthday!" Am I right?! Sure, I'm right! So, rather than regale/bore you with a list of things I did/got for my birthday I thought I'd give you something. That's right...it's my birthday but you get the gift!!

Whoa, there! Be forewarned: I am no Oprah. But I did manage to collect a few of my favorite things to give away to you, yes, you! Sure, it's because I am grateful for the many ways that you and blogging have brought so much joy and reward to my life over the last few years. But it's mostly because I'm very curious about who you are.

You see, I have this stat/counter thing on my blog homepage that allows me to see how many people check in to see me stumble/wobble/ and occasionally /soar in my attempts at living a life worthy. By this account I know that over the course of the week there are hundreds of you peeping in on me and mine. Or, there are the few faithful who check in occasionally and perhaps one or two people who check in hourly on a daily basis and drive my stats up in a very erroneous and misleading way. Said people or person who have nothing better to do. Should this be the case, I am very interested in meeting you, person or two, if only to say I'm sorry that I have nothing of incredible interest or fanfare to offer you. Except perhaps to offer you a job as a housecleaner for no other reason than to help you escape the monotony that is your day. And to help me escape the monotony that is toilet cleaning and dishwasher emptying and laundry put awaying and errand running to indulge in spaces of time wastefulness when I would do nothing but sit and drink Diet Coke and eat Ben and Jerry's Chunky Monkey.

I'm desperately hoping in the former possibility. That there is perhaps those of you out there, friends or strangers, that have happened along here for whatever reason and have chosen to keep reading without threat of family disownment for not doing so or spousal obligation or with fear and trepidation that I will repeat the embarrassing thing you/your child did/said today within my sight/hearing.

Whoever you are, today is Happy to you. All you have to do is leave your name in the comment box below or email me privately if lingering here is a shameful waste of time when your husband/roomate/parent thinks that you are busy cooking/having a life/studying. (I include the email option in case only my husband and mom comment, leaving the rest of you assuming my legions of other readers opted to email.) You don't even have to write anything nice or complimentary or say Happy Birthday. I just want to know who you are.

Sadly, I am not Oprah. (I did warn you of that, didn't I?!) I do not, I repeat, I do not have a brand new car for you and I do not have a few of my favorite things for each of you. Therefore, I will be forced to randomly choose only one of you to receive this gift. My apologies to those of you who only continued reading long enough to find out what you have won. There is only one winner in life today.

Happy to YOU!!

Favorite thing #1: CD of Remedy Drive who you can watch here. Hands down most requested cd in the house/van/truck/anywhere. But no matter how many times you try, you'll never be able to belt out "Daylight is cooooooooooming!" like Manu!

 

Favorite thing #2: $5 gift card to Starbucks. I'm partial to the Java Chip Frappaccino but you're welcome to indulge in a more season appropriate drink, namely a warm one like their Signature Hot Chocolate.

Favorite thing #3: Cannot leave home without it! I feel naked without gum in my mouth, have to be chomping all day long!

Now, I'm off to enjoy the Thanksgiving holiday with family up from the US. I'll check back in a few days/week to pick a winner.

Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours!!

Dream maker/giver

Ten years ago he bought a friend and I dinner while guests of his family
And he became our host.

Nine and a half years ago he tried winning a carnival game for my little sister
And he became part of the family.

A few months later he gave me his email address
And he became my pen pal.

We wrote for months and months, sharing our lives
And he became a dear friend.

Eight years ago he bought me lunch and told me of his desire
And he became my suitor.

Each day he cherished and encouraged and empowered me
And he became the wind beneath my wings.

A few months into our courtship, he showered me with jewelry and gifts
And he became my sugar daddy. ;o)

Soon after he bought me a stunning engagement ring
And he became my fiance.

On our wedding day, before family and friends,
He was, once and for all, only mine, my husband.

Fast forward past the honeymoon, the notsohoneymoonanymore, four babies, three job changes, a miracle, a move, highs, lows,....

Two years ago he brought home an early surprise birthday, a camera,
And he became a well thanked hubby.

Six months ago he dutifully researched and bought me a newer, better one,
And he became the enabler to my growing passion.

Yesterday he surprised me with the desire of my heart, Photoshop,
And he became my dream maker and Dream giver.

For the past few months I have seriously considered starting my own photography business. I've practiced and researched and even ventured out with new, non-familial clients. Last week I was even commissioned to shoot a junior league hockey game. With a powerful $1700 (rented) lens attached to my camera, people easily mistook me for the {real} deal!

Besides the ability, creativity, and knowledge of knowing how to take great pictures, there are a few other necessities to taking your passion to the business level. One of such necessities was Photoshop. I longed for it. I dreamed of it. I tried winning it in a random giveaway. And yet, I knew my dream (#23) and Dream (#1) were mere shadows of reality and the probability of them ever being fulfilled in the not so far away future were slim.

So yesterday, when he, my husband, wanted to give me my birthday present early I urged him to hold onto it. I didn't know if I could muster ample excitement over another sweater or a pair of cozy pj's. He insisted and as I opened the envelope bearing the news of my gift, I started crying. Tears of joy mingled with tears overflowing from a heart that felt so unworthy of such a gift, such an investment. It was more than the physical actualization of the object of my affection, it was the realization that this man, this husband of mine, believed in me.

When he asked me to be his wife, his proposal told me he believed in me as a woman, that he knew in his heart that I would make a fine wife and mother. When he invested in my dreams, his gift told me he believes in me, believes in my ability, believes in my ideas, believes that I can do great things.

Years ago when he started to pursue me, the greatest gift he gave was the gift of confidence, helping me to believe that I had something to offer, that I was a catch worth coming after, that I could be the answer to some man's dream.

Yesterday as he continued to invest in me, his gift allows me to pursue my dreams and continue to build that confidence that I can do this, that I can use what little talents I have been given and reap a full harvest of reward.

To my husband, who continues to be the one with whom I make all my dreams and the one who helps so many of them to pass into the dimension of reality, thank you. I stepped into a world of full acceptance and continual support when our worlds collided. I am grateful, so grateful for your love.

*and now a note to address Jen's and other's concerns about who will now be homeschooling the children and cooking the meals now that the mother is fully engrossed in sewing and photo editing?!?...The first one to report for duty has the job! :O)

a mother's job

Comfort.
Bandage.
Console.
Snuggle.
Hold.
Soothe.
Protect.
Spin.
Embrace.
Fix.
Nurture.
Foster.
Mend.
Assist.
Cover.
Provide.
Welcome.
Squeeze.
Encourage.
Kiss.
Adore.
Respect.
Cherish.
Delight.
Accompany.
Treasure.
Nurse.
Rejoice.
Admire.
Involve.
Teach.
Water.
Instruct.

angels/demons

I have such a heart for humanity
But soon grow annoyed with every human that I meet.

I love to send my money overseas to the impoverished
But have no groceries to spare for my local food bank.

My heart breaks for the victims of natural disaster
But only judges those whose hard times are a result of personal choices.

I'd love to donate a day or two to a cause close to my heart
But cannot spare a moment or two to help my neighbor.

At Christmastime I resolve to help at the local soup kitchen
While neglecting the dirty dishes in my own.

I cry over hurts committed against me
So I solemnly commit to repay evil for evil.

I grimace at the thought of others speaking ill of me
So I toast my insecurities by spreading the latest gossip.

I invest my time in researching how to be a better parent
Only so I can correct others' negative approach.

I dutifully instruct my children to speak with kindness
While interrupting with pseudo-profanities for a reckless driver.

My heart aches for the children of broken homes
Yet feels no remorse when I speak a bitter word to my husband.

I sympathize with the weaknesses and struggles of others
And capitalize on their flaws to elevate my imagined perfection.

I stand in humbled awe before talented and intelligent people
While grumbling in discontent at my seeming lack.

____________________

I want so much a heart like Jesus
Yet continually seem to have only Adam's.

I desire more than anything a humble spirit
But only feel good when others recognize my worth.

I'm so grateful God didn't come to save the angels
But sinners like me who seemingly allow demons to reside within.

happy to me!!

Emmanuelle loves birthdays! She especially loves singing the obligatory song that goes with your special day. In fact, she offers up her celebratory anthem for any and every special occasion. Often. With one amendment - she omits the word "birthday". "Happy to you, happy to you!"

I'm looking forward to my upcoming birthday next week when I hope she'll serenade me for the first time since learning to talk with a private solo early in the morning. But not too early! After all, sleeping in is at the top of my wish list - till noon, at least!

But it won't be the first "Happy Birthday" I've heard this year. Already I've been surprised with a party by my mother-in-law with friends and this morning at church I was taken off guard by another "Happy Birthday" and a birthday card wrapped around this surprise:

I was super shocked and equally psyched!! I have been shamelessly borrowing my friend Nancy's for years and even called her last night to borrow it again. She agreed to bring it today knowing full well I would be receiving my very own this morning. I am so grateful and touched that my friends thought of the perfect gift and humbled that they were willing to invest in giving me a gift that I will treasure and remember for ever! (deep breath...that was a bit of a run-on sentence!)

Thank you, Armand and Nancy, Paul and Marcelle, Ruth and Leah, Amma and Appa, and John! Thank you from the bottom of my heart! You have made this year one to remember!

feed the birds

It's been two weeks already since we fed the birds and I'm just now posting pictures for Gma to see! A friend took us to this obscure little trail a few minutes from our home where we could feed the birds tuppence a bag. (Actually, it was provided!) The pictures seem to tell of a simple experience but words nor pictures can adequately convey the euphoria we felt. To mingle with these little creatures, another part of the animal world that God created, and feel no separation or fear while near them was pure joy. The kids were only slightly hesitant at first but soon were beckoning for visitors with calls of "chick-a-dee-dee-dee" to their all-you-can-eat buffet of birdseed sprinkled on hands, hats, and even foreheads.

The time spent with the chickadees prompted a study for school and this is a little of what we learned:
1.) Boy and girl chickadees look the same.
2.) They often hide the seed in various places, sometimes thousands of different hiding spots, and can remember them all.
3.) Their calls are extremely complex and very similar to language.
4.) The dee notes contain information about which flock it belongs to.

Random fieldtrips with friends beats a day in a desk anyday!

scissorhands

Nightly duties for bedtime include:
1. teeth brushed
2. jammies on
3. hair brushed cuts

Poor Elsabels inherited her mother's fine (read: limp and lifeless) hair and receded hairline. What to do, what to do?!? Bangs, perhaps? So we imagined and we fiddled, tried turning up her hair to see what she might look like with shorter front hairs. I nervously brought out the scissors and hoped I wouldn't regret the decision.

Result: a spunky new 'do that's all you, my dear! Work it, girl! xo mama

 

wisin' up

I used to think that being stressed meant you just didn't take the time to count your blessings.
Now I know that even Blessings (count 'em: one, two, three, four!) can leave you feeling stressed.

I used to think that every shortcoming was cause for humiliation.
Now I know they are rather opportunities for humility.

I used to think if you admitted to having problems it made you weak.
Now I know that having struggles makes you human and the struggle makes you stronger.

I used to think some people were just better than other people, a gift of genetics and/or opportunity.
Now I know we are each uniquely equipped to be the Best we were created to be.

I used to think that enough concealer and make-up could hide my imperfections.
Now I know that nothing can conceal a bitter spirit or mask the radiance of inner joy.

I used to think I had to always speak my mind and assert my truth onto everyone.
Now I know a silent example is the strongest testimony to the Truth.

I used to think that a sense of humor was reserved for stand up comedians.
Now I know a sense of humor is a gift and a choice to find joy in everything.

I used to think that organic = healthy = guilt-/calorie-free.
Now I know that binging on organic granola and walnuts can still put a few pounds on your hips. ;o)

I (heart) political movies

Maybe that's why I have such fond affection for Madagascar.

Sorry, have I lost you already?!

The kids sat in front of the babysitter this afternoon while I scurried around packing the fam up for our trip to TO. They know the words by heart and start giggling and jumping around in anticipation of their favorite lines. Today as I listened I overheard this:

Alex the lion: "That is your side of the island, and this is our side of the island. That is the bad side, where you can skip and prance around like a magical pixie horse, and do whatever the heck you wanna do all day long. This is the good side, for those who love New York and care about getting back."

The lines seemed all too familiar, so similar to the constant discourse preceding today's election. It seems America has divided herself and has taken separate and opposing sides on the very big island that is our country. One side labels the other as The Bad Side. The other side accuses it's opposition as being hypnotized by shallow claims and prancing around like intoxicated pixies. They both claim to be the only side that really loves America.

Seems the lions and hippos and giraffes and zebras have forgotten that we all have to share this island and that progress and change will only come as we put aside our differences and work together. Sure, Alex made a really great statue and Marty seemed able to conjure fire like magic but one without the other would have made for a lonely and weakened existence.

Today we will choose as a nation what leader we want to be at our great country's helm for the next four years. Some citizens will be elated while others mourn their loss. But tomorrow we need to tear down the walls of division and put away notions that there is a bad or a good side to be on. For we are all on One side, the side of Lady Liberty (no, not the hippo version!). And until I am granted that one way ticket off this great Island, by death or God's return (I draw the line at a cruise ship navigated by psychotic penguins), I will submit to and intercede for the man that God places on Her throne.

Romans 13:1 Everyone must submit himself to the governing authorities, for there is no authority except that which God has established. The authorities that exist have been established by God.

first {real} clients

They moved into the neighborhood only a couple of months ago. Days later they moved into our lives and hearts as playmates and friends. The first time we chatted I knew that this family was going to be a Godsend. A future babysitter (in a few months time), a same-age friend, and a Boy to provide our son an escape from the estrogen saturated environment that is his world. Oh, and the mom and dad are pretty cool too! Mom W. first approached me about doing an anniversary picture of her and Pops W. but soon the whole family joined, plus the family dog. Fall had already begun it's abrupt exit from our lives so the background colors were scarce. But while our scenery lacked in beauty, this family more than compensated with their winsome smiles and jovial interaction. They offered to pay me (?!) but I just couldn't accept as I'm just a girl obsessed with her camera and not a {real} photograhper. But you would've been hard pressed to convince me after bringing in my first (charitable) paycheck of two loonies. Thank you, clients. Thank you, neighbors! You made me feel like the {real} deal!